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Ordway Law Group, LLC
Divorce & Family Law

How can you handle shared custody with a narcissist?

On Behalf of | Aug 16, 2021 | Child Custody, Child Custody |

In many cases, co-parenting and shared custody is ideal for parents and children alike. However, if you are dealing with a narcissistic ex, it may feel like an endless battle, even when you think the two of you should be in agreement.

According to WebMD, there are red flags that you may be dealing with a narcissistic parent.

Narcissistic behavior

Narcissists tend to have a strong sense of self-importance but do not have empathy. Your ex may act arrogant or call him or herself unique. If your spouse tends to manipulate and become angry when things do not go his or her way, you may find it difficult to negotiate or communicate. While your spouse may fight for visitation and custody, he or she typically does so as punishment to you.

Coparenting solutions

When dealing with a narcissist, one of the first things you need to accept is that the person probably will not change. Acceptance allows you to set boundaries and focus on your parenting plan. Never deviate from the parenting plan. Decide everything ahead of time. When you do make plans with your former spouse, make sure that you have everything in writing.

Arguing with a narcissist does not work. Instead, you could walk right into a trap set by your ex. Try to remain calm and to think about your answers to any questions or requests. If your parent shows signs of his or her narcissism in front of the children, try to talk to them about the behavior. Never blame your children or let them think they have any fault in the situation.

While you cannot control your ex, you can control how you parent your children.

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