Divorce is difficult and when you share children, the emotional toll is higher. Dividing up time with your children, not to mention the legal and financial ramifications that go along with them can turn an already complex matter contentious.
In the wake of this, the court expects you and your ex to parent collectively from separate households. However, if you do not think this can happen, you have the option of creating a parallel parenting structure and presenting that to the judge.
What is parallel parenting?
Marriages do not usually end because couples get along well. If your breakup stirred up heavy feelings of anger, a traditional co-parenting model may not work.
While a parallel model still keeps your children’s welfare at the forefront, it changes the way it happens. In a parallel model, parents agree not to communicate directly, and if it is necessary, only in writing. It also usually indicates that parents will not attend the same functions.
What does this do?
A parallel parenting plan removes the possibility of emotions getting in the way of parenting children. Exchanges in writing remain more black and white. Yes, opportunities for arguments still exist; however, the other parent merely needs to ignore the email or text rather than engage and have a fight.
Creating a parallel plan is not a sign of failure. You recognize that your children need two stable households, and by cutting out any direct communication, you remove the turmoil and fighting that may occur.
Stability is critical for children, and the way you and the other parent accomplish this is a sign of responsibility and maturity.